22 Mar 19

By Dominic Byrne

Single Parent Getting After It

I’ve been a little quiet on the blog posts lately. I’ve commenced a few but have lacked spark and creativity to continue. If the motivation has been missing I haven’t bothered pushing it. I’m attempting to roll with the punches as best I can and not put myself under too much pressure in any way.

There is no consistency in how I am feeling. My emotions, motivation and daily mental health are very unpredictable. If I have several really good days, especially on the weekend, then I tend to crash in the proceeding days. It takes me a while to get back on an even keel again.

I think I’m doing as best as I can given the unfortunate circumstances. The whole situation of losing your closest companion is one major adjustment process.

There has been a lot of tedious administration tasks to sort through. We bucked the trend compared to most household financial management roles. Lou was good at managing money and all the tasks that surrounded both our domestic and work-related accounting matters. Even when I sold my investment property that I had for ten years, I had her manage both the process and the funds, all transferred and managed in her name. She was good at it. For a technically progressive guy, I didn’t even have online banking activated. When I needed money I just asked for it, a bit like a 1950’s housewife but not oppressed, a convenient situation by choice…..

I liked it that way. I will have no problem managing the money from this point forward but I preferred the previous arrangement better. In many ways, Lou “wore the pants” in our marriage and I loved it like that. Until Lou died, I had never even logged into my own work accounting system. Lou and I didn’t have a will either, so all of our accounts, except one, are currently frozen. I’ve had to source birth and marriage certificates, many re-applied for, as I don’t know where Lou stored such paperwork. I was required to have all the family papers officially translated to German so that I can get a formal death certificate and I am now in the process of getting the death certificate translated to English for legal purposes back here at home.

It’s a real grind doing all of this painful, monotonous administrative stuff. Mainly because I keep shaking my head and wonder why the fuck am I doing this shit in the first place?

Sorry. I’m not complaining. I just miss the old system where I worried about very little because I had someone in my home conveniently managing it all for me. I am currently getting some great help by several people to sort it all out and handle it moving forward.

So who’s seen the Netflix series; The After Life?

I have.

You might ask why would I watch a series about a guy (Tony, played by Ricky Gervais) who had the perfect life – until his wife Lisa died of breast cancer.

I watch very few series, I watch zero television and only occasionally watch the odd movie. I guess I was rolling the dice deciding to watch The After Life. The main drawcard was Ricky Gervais. I’ve always been a massive fan of his productions and I was curious how he would put together such a narrative.

In the already successful series, which is made up of six easy 30 min shows, Tony, formerly a nice guy, changes dramatically after the tragic event of his wife’s death. In several episodes, Tony both talks about and contemplates taking his own life. He carries on in a depressive state saying and doing whatever the hell he likes. He doesn’t give a shit about himself or anybody else. I won’t give too much more away than that, in case you decide to watch it.

The series made me feel better about myself because Tony is pretty messed up. If it wasn’t for my kids I am sure I’d be much more like Tony.

The After Life Scene With Ricky Gervais

Has anyone seen The After Life? What did you think?

Has anyone else seen it? I’ll give you the reasons why I liked the show once it has aired for a while as I would need to talk about the last couple of episodes. Ricky is one funny dude. He wrote, directed and starred in this Netflix series himself.

I hope you’re all well.


  1. Hey Dom,
    I finished watching “The After Life” the night before we had a chat. I was unsure if it was appropriate to bring it to your attention as it is so close to the mark. I thought it was brilliant though and pleased that you watched it. I really enjoyed his transition into the person he becomes in the last episode.
    Some good laugh out loud moments too.

    Liking the blog

  2. I had to come back and let you know I went and watched afterlife. I also love Ricky’s TV shows. It’s great. A little dark but great. I hope you got a laugh out of it. You deserve a laugh. Take care

  3. I had to come back and let you know as a fellow fan of Ricky’s TV shows you inspired me to go and find it. I actually loved it. It was great. Dark. But great. I hope it made you laugh more than it made you cry. I did both. Take care Dom. You’re doing perfectly. Keep going.

  4. I am a big fan of Ricky and have watched most of this series. I think it is brilliant. It is so full of wonderful dark humour that also made my heart hurt too, being so very close to home. Its super cool you saw it too 😉

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